Friday, March 16, 2012

daytime talk show questions?

[oh shut up. i take lots of breaks and i've got npr on the whole time. promise.]
is dr. phil a misunderstood genius?
is kelly ripa an alien space midget?
do kathie lee and hoda retreat to their dressing rooms at 10:57am every morning trashed and sobbing?
is it unhealthy to be addicted to daytime talk shows dealing with addiction? and is it addictive?
what sort of crazy depraved people sit in the audience of these shows, and how can i get tickets? do they allow dogs?
do the gals over there on "the view" not make any sense a lot? and does elizabeth stare at herself in the monitor so much that she forgets where she is?
does rachael rae's quest to be the ultimate man's man chef render her food bland, dated and pedestrian? much like her personality?
[is "every ghetto every city" just basically lauren hill putting on an exquisite master class in restraint and how to sing across and over the bar line?]
is "the chew" completely pointless?
on a relevancy scale of 1 to 100, 100 being the highest, is "the talk"'s the same as the hosts' median i.q., namely, 58?
can it now be said to both regis and oprah, "how can we ever miss you when you will never go away ever?" ?
how do you shame the shameless? the amish are laughing at us again.

4 comments:

Keifus said...

Maybe you have to alm the Amish (hey, cheese and woodcraft only sells for so much). Or arm them, but only around Harvard Square.

Rachel Rae's food is, no doubt, somewhat tasty, but nowhere near as sexy and appealing as she thinks it is.

Doctor Phil is neither a physician nor dirt.

K [hope that hand heals right up.]

Schmutzie said...

And I didn't even get a chance to hate Rosie's Show before O cancelled it.

Hey Moonpie, take old club-hand there are go outside. Look up. Now, look to the southwest. See those two bright lights? The brighter one is Venus, and the one below and left is Jupiter. Can you howl at that or what? It's called a conjunction. Good dog Moonpie.

switters said...

speaking of amish, my fox affiliate shows "the office" every night at 11. last night was the episode in which michael takes over production of the dunder/mifflin commercial. he's narrating and says, ..."and when life moves at the speed of time..." wish i'd written that. the finger will be fine, but that guitar just sits there collecting dust.

switters said...

west by southwest here. just spectacular. and as you can imagine not a lot of light pollution. ripped a board today. only took 45 minutes.