Monday, January 9, 2012

BACHELOR XXIVX: ATTACK OF THE GIANT ALIEN SPACE ROBOT CUNTS

(TOO MUCH?!?!) SO, YEAH, I WAS REALLY DRUNK DURING LAST YEAR'S RUN (WHAT?), WHICH TURNED OUT TO BE A GOOD THING BECAUSE THIS SHOW REALLY IS A LOT MORE TOLERABLE WASTED! ALSO, I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE A PARAGRAPH! OR SPELL. ANYWAYS, THIS SEASON IS REALLY TURNING OUT TO BE REALITY TV AT IT'S BEST! NAMELY, FAKE. THOUGH THE RELATIVE INSANE RETARDATION OF THOSE INVOLED MAKES IT THAT MUCH MORE REAL! THERE SEEMS TO BE A DEARTH OF THOSE INVOLVED WITH THE WHOLE DENTAL HYGENICS GAME, E.G., THERE SEEMS TO BE AT LEAST MORE THAN THREE DENTAL HYGENECISTS. (WONDERING WHAT ALL THE SHOUTING IS ABOUT? I'M TESTING BLOGGER. THEY'LL FAIL. AGAIN!) ALSO, IS A "VIP COCKTAIL WAITRESS" CODE FOR "ACTOR/SINGER/HOOKER", OR JUST "SKANK/GIZ JAR"?!? WTF??? EITHER WAY, I'M "HOOKED"! (SORRY. NO AFFILIATES CARRY ACCESS HOLLYWOOD, SO MY 4-1-1 IS MORE LIKE OPERATOR ERRRORR! ER... BUT WE'LL ALWAYS HAVE PUNCTUATION.) still, while the gal from clarksville tn is quite sweet and decent, and the blogger chick from nyc is clearly on a lithium bicarbonate cocktail, this batch of bridesmaids just don't seem to understand da roolz! i.e., leave your dignitiy, grace, self-esteem and any remnant of awareness at the door. the bedroom door, that is!!! and assume the (fetal) position!

6 comments:

Keifus said...

?!

I've got down to Colbert, football, and Top Chef, and yet I still can't seem to escape the motherfucking omnipresence of the thing.

switters said...

keif, i don't see him as the prematurely deflated blowup doll type. but that may be just me.

Schmutzie said...

Ala-fuckin'-BAMA!!

Ohhh, so defense wins championships? Who knew?

Isonomist said...

Oh my. Mom and I saw the hook spot for this one, with nothing but a sobbing chick huddled in a corner. And we just looked at each other simultaneously shaking our heads. I can't watch any show that makes me act exactly like my mother.

rundeep said...

Project Runway All-Stars. Further affiant sayeth not.

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